Things that look like diced chicken but in fact are not:
I'm lookin at you Tofu
and Artichoke Hearts
Want to get me upset? Make a dish that has these items prepared in a way to look like I am piling my plate full of yummy chicken. Then I'll go to take a bite, have that strange moment in my mouth where my brain is saying yum chicken but my tongue is saying, "nah bro, its bogus" and in that fight the food temporarily tastes like air. That'll make me hulk out.